Flu season.

I think I may just stay home and keep Austin home and locked up with me this winter. I don't do flu shots. 4 or 5 years ago I got the flu shot. Within a week of the shot I got the flu. That winter, I got it 3 more times. Horrible sick feverish can't get off the couch flu's. The next year, I didn't get the flu shot. I didn't get the flu. And I haven't since. I know I won't be getting the flu shot. The only thing is will Austin. I really don't know. When I was a baby I got the measles shortly after getting my measles shot. I got really sick. Even though it wasn't right after his shots Austin got Roseola (baby measles.) How? I still haven't figured it out. No one we know has had the measles. He needed to come in contact with it to get it. How did he come in contact? Did the stuff from the vaccinations stay dormant for a while then decide to rear it's ugly head? I don't know. Do I really want to give him the flu shot knowing my history with shots??? After the measles thing, do I want to test out the flu shot on him?? Not really sure.

**Yes, I know every single medical professional and all the information put out about the flu shot says over and over again you can't get the flu from the flu shot. If you can't someone please explain to me what happened, and why I got sick so many times that year but haven't gotten sick since...**

Don't even get me started on the H1N1 shot. H1N1 scares the shit out of me. I'm on a few different chat boards and have heard about how healthy mothers have died from this virus leaving their babies behind. I've heard of children having it and being horribly sick and in comas. I've heard on the news of all the deaths. It scares me. But..... I've also heard about the lack of testing on the H1N1 shot and the girl who can only walk backwards... (as funny as it sounds it's pretty scary) Do I really want to put myself or my child at risk?? I'm going to be putting him at risk anyways. Do I risk giving him the vaccine and him getting some horrible side effect from it because there isn't comprehensive testing and trials done on the vaccine? Or even worse, if it something like the flu shot and knowing my history getting the shot and getting sick from it? Or, do I risk not giving him the shot and put him at risk of getting H1N1. Could I live with myself if either of us gets sick either way?

So, if you need to find us, we may be locked up in our house until spring.....