Back to work

Sigh, back to work time. This afternoon Dave heads back up north for work. I'm not going to lie. Him being home for 4 weeks, I got spoiled. Just this morning I slept until 10am. That's virtually unheard of with a 3 year old. The sleep and help with said 3 year old has been amazing.

I'm on a mom board, and with Austin having a birthday so late in the year, most of the moms with 3 year olds are months ahead of me. The consensus is that the terrible 2's aren't so terrible. 3 is worse. I know that the first few months of 3 are great, then BAM! They turn into little jerks. Yup, Austin's hit that point. He does not want to listen and everything is answered with a "uh uh" "NO!" or "no way!" He is ignoring everything we say, and the other day started pushing our friend's daughter. We've never had a big issue with pushing, so this was a shock.

I'm counting down the days until Dave gets home again, because I'm sure these next 2 weeks will be full of time outs and deep breaths.

Counting down.

In 6 more days it's Mommylicious. I have been busy working and getting everything organized. I still have a lot of work to do though. My to do list is getting shorter but not short enough.





Dave is gone for work but may be getting sent home tomorrow due to the wildfires in Northern Alberta. The only upside to this is that I will be able to get more work done with him here to help watch Austin. I can only get so much done during nap time and after bedtime before I'm exhausted. I've made some really cute new cards and will be putting them up on my craft blog in a few days. You can also check my facebook page or etsy shop to see them in the next few days.





Anyone in the edmonton area want to stop by and say Hello at mommylicious I will be in booth number 9!! If you want to check out all the awesome vendors that will be there, here is the link If you scroll down to the layout of the site and hover over number 9 you can click on that link to see our profile for the show.

This month.

I am a pretty tough cookie. I can put up with a lot of crap. I can turn my back and let the shat bounce off my back. I can remain calm during temper tantrums and sass.

I am also extremely thankful to my husband for having the strength to work away from home to provide us things, food, housing, etc.

This is not a post about him not being here. It's about doing my best while he's gone.

Last year as some of you faithful readers may have read last month I finally went to the dr about my depression. Before that, there were definite bad days with Austin and me feeling like crap and I was full of resentment and anger. I would be mad at him for no reason. Then I started taking my meds, my husband was home working and everything seemed fine.

Then he couldn't get a job. We made the decision to move to Alberta. He would go and I would stay, sell the house, tie up the loose ends, try to stay in one piece.

Let me tell you, I was terrified. I was so worried that I would have those bad days again, take it out on Austin, and Dave wouldn't be there to stop me. I didn't realize just how bad I was until I went on my meds and I decided I didn't want to be like that again. With Dave leaving I was afraid. I started to tell family, reaching out for help. Family knowing that if I called in a panic it was ok, I just needed help.

Thankfully, it was ok. We fell into a routine of getting out of the house every day to stop me from going insane. Even if we only got out for an hour, we were out of the house. I was getting better, and even though there were a few sad days thinking ahead to not being around my friends and family, everything was ok. I was more patient with Austin. (Note I'm not saying completely patient, he was almost 2, there are some days you just want to pull your hair out)

Then we moved. I had a plan. I had joined a meetup group. I was going to get out everyday and just try to pass the days until Dave was home again. No problem. Until Dave got laid off. He was home for 2 1/2 months.

He was helping me for 2 1/2 months. cooking, cleaning, sanity saving. When he had a job for the one week I will admit, I was kind of a mess. There were a few days I just brought toys into our bedroom between meals and just laid in bed sad while Austin played on the floor. Dishes piled up. everything was a mess. When Dave did come home, I could tell he was upset with me.

When Dave got another job, I was worried. I didn't want Austin to miss out on fun and getting out of the house. I was worried because for 2 1/2 months I didn't have to do everything on my own. I had help. But now I was all alone again.

Let me tell you. It's been all right. We've been doing amazing. We've had days of lounge around in pj's all day, but we've been playing and tickling and racing cars while in our pj's. Dave gets home tomorrow night. He has been gone for a month. It doesn't seem like a month. We've been doing mall walking at random malls, taking random driving trips around Edmonton, and going to indoor play places.

We have been a-ok and I think I've been pretty good with Austin. Only getting really mad when the situation warrants it (hello sharpie on the cupboards)and showering him with lots of kisses, cuddles and tickles. There is lots of laughter in this house and I can't even begin to tell you just how amazing it is to hear his non stop giggles mixed in with him telling his stories.

We are awesome and tomorrow night my amazing and wonderful husband will be home for 4 days of fun and laughter and joy. Joy in our awesome little family. Joy in knowing the future won't always be as hard as it's been but we're way better off after getting through the tough times together.

Anxiety

11 Minutes ago the call out began.

Dave is at the hall.

They say Good morning let's begin.

They usually start with people who have been laid off since August. Maybe one or two guys heads up to the dispatch window.

Then they move to September, then October.

Slowly they call the months up.

Lately they've gotten to october and there is a line up of people at the dispatch window.

We are December 2nd.

Come on December.

The last week and half has sucked. With the holidays the hall has been closed quite a bit. It was closed monday so yesterday they didn't have any calls.

Today there is hope.

Today there are 51 jobs.

I don't know if I want to cry that there is a chance he will get a job, or cry because he might not get one.

Again.

Another disappointment.

I try to stay positive but I also try not to jinx it.

Please whatever karmic/godly/supernatural powers are out there.

Let today be a happy day.

Please.

One more thing out of the way

You know what is worse then leaving all of your friends and family and moving across the country, to an unknown place where nothing is familiar? Losing your job too. It sucks the big one. That is what happened to us. I haven't really posted much other then on twitter about this, and my tweets didn't come until weeks after the fact.


We moved here, and arrived on Monday. Dave worked a camp job and was flown in and out of the job site for 2 weeks at a time. I drove him to the airport Wednesday. Said goodbye and had a slight panic attack about how I was going to manage once his parents went home and I was there all alone with austin. Thursday afternoon I got the dreaded call from Dave. They have to lay off some people, we don't know yet who or when exactly.....


Let me interject here and say, Dave is part of a union. It isn't as simple as I'm moving here, lets go work. He has his membership in Ontario and was working in Alberta on a travel card. Being a travel card in the Alberta union puts him low man on the totem pole. He gets a job after all the Alberta union guys have their choice. If they don't want it, then the travel cards can take them. Totally makes sense. Since we were moving here Dave applied for his membership to be transfered to the Alberta union. Of course, it isn't as easy as saying, please transfer my membership. They have to make sure that he is dedicated to transferring and he's not going to jump ship within a few months. Again, makes sense. So there are so many hours he has to work here before they will transfer his membership. Then, there is a few weeks worth of paperwork then we're good to go. Now, back to my story......


So, Dave calls and says they are doing layoffs. He is a good worker, but they can't fire a union guy (person) and keep a travel card. Believe me, we had this issue with his last job. So he called back to let me know that afternoon, yes, he's on the chopping block. He has to go to work friday morning for a few hours then he's back on the plane home. There really isn't anything he can do as all the travel cards got laid off. It sucks. He has been going into the union hall every day they have calls in hopes that there are enough jobs and not enough union members to take them. So far, no dice.


I've been getting really frustrated and upset. What kind of Karma do we have to deserve this? I don't recall doing anything bad to anyone recently. I just don't get it. For those of you following me on twitter may remember this tweet

It sucks. It really does. Day after day of holding out hope when he leaves this house at 8am only to be home at 10:30 without a happy tone in his voice saying guess what honey, I got a job. I might cry when that actually happens.

Now, he knows he's getting close to the hours needed to transfer membership as he's been working here in Alberta for over a year now. However he just kept being told "nope, not there yet." It was getting frustrating. But, we had a little bit of light at the end of the tunnel, they've approved him for membership. The paperwork was started and we just had to wait a few more weeks.

We got the call today. That awesome phone call saying all the paperwork has been signed by the appropriate parties (aka the union in Ontario) and now he has to go sign it tomorrow. Such a big weight lifted off our shoulders. Not only does he now get job options above the travel cards, but he can be name hired. Meaning if someone likes his work they don't have to get a random guy from the hall to work, they can hire him instead. YAY!! Still, he doesn't have a job and he's heading into the union hall again tomorrow to wait and see if he can get one, but things are looking up a little bit and one more obstacle is out of the way.

We just keep taking it one day at a time, and the days turn into weeks and this saturday? It will be one month of him being off work. I don't know how much longer this will take but I'm hoping and praying that the light at the end of that tunnel gets off it's dimmer switch and starts burning at it's bright and sunny setting.

My little man is growing so quickly!!! He is now actually taking a step before falling over. He will be walking on his own in no time at all!!! He's figured out clapping and loves to do it. However you can't prompt him to do it, he just does it on his own. I'm not sure if I mentioned this in the last post but he's figured out how to turn the tv on and off. Kind of annoying when you're trying to watch something, but oh well, it's not that often.

There isn't really too much new with me. These hours I'm working are going to kill me. this week I work 1-10 and friday and saturday I work 2 or 2:30 - midnight. It really sucks. When I work late I don't usually get to sleep until at least 1am, then I'm up with Austin around 7. Makes for a very tired and worn out mommy. Then I have school on top of that. Let's just say I'm definately keeping myself busy! lol. I'm glad that Austin is so young because the moving around from house to house while I work doesn't seem to be affecting him.

Long time gone.

Well hello again.

I've been busy with work. I've finished my training class and now I am in "abay" which is on the phones but I have to reach certain goals before I can move on to regular work (which for me is better schedules) and for the rest of the people in my class it means a raise. The schedule sucks big time. We have sunday monday off which is fine, but we are working 1:30-10:30 and then saturday shifts usually start and end later. This shift is making child care arrangements a little difficult. It's not like I can just not worry because Dave will be home to watch him all night. I have to get someone to either take Austin for the night or hang out at my house until I'm done work. It sucks.

Friday night after work some of us from our training class went out to boston Pizza afterwards to have a drink. Austin was spending the night at Grandma and Grandpa R's so I went along. It was fun, we chatted, enjoyed some food (mmmm nachos!) then I got home around 1am. Last night Austin had another sleepover at Grandma and Grandpa R's. Because I didn't have to rush home to relieve a babysitter I went with a classmate to the car wash. They had left a cooler in the back of their car full of water and a few left over beer and it tipped over and created puddles in the back. We went and used the wet vaccuum and spent 2 hours trying to get the water out of the back of the car. I got home around 2:30. I slept in through church this morning because I was a little tired so I figured I should update here a bit then get moving since church is over soon.

Austin turned 10 months old last weekend..... And got baby measles (aka Roseola) He broke out in spots sunday morning. His 10 month old pictures are coming. They were taken very late unfortunately. Sunday we were dealing with all the spots and the dr's then we had to pick Dave up from the airport. Monday was a busy day complete with my first day of night school. Tuesday and wednesday we were out of town at a funeral and thursday I was back to work and dave was back to the airport. I finally got the pictures taken yesterday but he didn't really have a lot of spots left.

We still have no teeth, and still have very little hair. Maybe he will have some hair by his second birthday.. lol. Austin is getting closer and closer to walking. I went to put him in the bath last week and when I put him on the floor in the bathroom he stayed crouched down, picked up his bath toys then stood himself up and stood there for a good 2 minutes while I got his bath stuff ready. Once I turned the water on though he grabbed the tub and tried to look in. He is also starting to take a few steps while holding on to only one hand instead of freezing up as soon as you let go of one of his hands. He has mastered closing things. He has a pop up toy at Dave's parents and he won't push the buttons to make the animals pop up but he loves to put the lids back down. And, He loves cupboards. He will sit and open and close cupboards for ever. Unfortunately the closing ends up as slamming and it gets pretty noisy. If there is something bothering him or in his way he pushes it out of his way, and he can turn pages in books (and also rip pages out of magazines instead of turning them.) He will lay in his crib on his back just waiting for his blanket, then he will take the blanket in his arms, roll over and go to sleep. He melts my heart every day, even when he's crying and won't settle down at 1am. He is saying Dada, we are trying to get him to connect dada with Dave. I think it's working a little but he still says it for a lot of things. He says mama as well, but I find he usually only says it while crying. I'm not sure if he's connected me as his mama and is calling for me or if he's just saying it while crying. A funny thing happened a while ago, I was trying to get him to say mama and I said to him "Can you say mama? I'm your mama" and he just shook his head no after the I'm your mama part. It was cute and funny.